the authentic self

Becoming Who We Are Created to Be

I walked out along the beach at sunrise one morning recently. A tropical storm was ready to move in, so clouds were obstructing the usually brilliant, dramatic display of sun and moon. But the power of light over darkness couldn’t be denied. Through the gray came a beam of light. A promise of day.

Hundreds of folks have come to me over the decades for help, guidance, hope, and healing. When they first present themselves, gray clouds overshadow their hearts. Without exception, I tell every one of my patients that they are perfect, unique and beloved. Some have never been given that information. Few believe it to be true. I often hear them say in response something along the lines of “You don’t know me. If you did you wouldn’t think I’m worth saving.” They have lost sight of who they really are. Only the false self, like those clouds of an approaching storm, seems to be visible.

But those clouds, Lord, those clouds! Gathering, menacing, thick and foreboding, they haunt my horizon, obscuring my hope, draping in shadows my plans for tomorrow…”

~ Fr. Austin Fleming (From A Concord Pastor)

The false self is merely a construct of our minds. It hides our true nature behind years of built-up fears, doubts, and insecurities. Seeking to please others, it creates a made-up image or persona to present so that nobody can see or know the authentic person within. Not that the false self is all bad. It serves us well in surviving and getting through the obstacles of life. But there comes a time when it is necessary to let go of our manufactured identity in favor of the authentic self who yearns to be revealed.

The authentic self is who we are created to be. One in union with God and all creation, it peaks through with every generosity, each kindness, and in the loving things we do. It shows up despite the darkness, shining on a path which leads away from selfishness, greed, and narcissism. It is where our superpowers reside.

There is an old Cherokee story about a boy and his grandfather which has been retold for generations. To me, it provides a key to living authentically. Here is a version I use:

One evening an elder told his grandson about A battle that goes on inside people. He said, "My son, there is a battle between two wolves inside us all.

One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, and superiority.

The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked: "Which wolf wins?"

The grandfather simply replied, "The one that you feed."

Developing the authentic self begins with feeding the right wolf. When the work is done, you will be known and loved for who you really are. Stormy times, though they will come and go, can never overpower you again.